So things in my life are not going so well right now.  I am lost and confused about a lot of things.  I want to make sure I am making the right decisions in my life.  Don’t read to much into it thought because it doesn’t mean much…just random words that fill my head.  I talked to my mom today.  She is so sick it really scares me.  I told her that I don’t feel like I belong with my family.  How ironic that is… when all this time I have been such a big advocate for family and now low and behold I don’t feel like I am close to mine.  I thought I was but moving back to Cookeville has proven that I am not as close as I though I was.  My mom bought a new car, which make likes her fourth in a two year span.  She bought one sold it to my brother.  Bought her second, then my sister got into a car accident, so my mom gave my sister her second car.  Then she had her third car for about seven months and now she has a new one.  So I pulled up and walked in and asked her where her car was.  I’m thinking that this is a rental because maybe her car is in the shop??  Oh I traded it in for a new one.  OKAY.  WOW, were have I been.  I sit down on her bed and ask how her legs are doing.  She has diabetic neuropathy.   Fine, why are you here.  Well I though I would stop by to share my life with you.  Let you know what’s going on in my life.  Not like you would do the same for me.  Then she wonders why I don’t feel like I am part of the family.